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"Our assignment now is to figure
out how to live the rest of our lives as our ideal life. We don't have
time for negativity anymore. It's time to have fun, have a good time. If
you have a good time, even in difficult circumstances, you're
invincible." - Carolyn See
I just returned from a wonderfully inspiring talk at UCLA by Carolyn See,
author of nine books, book reviewer for the Washington Post and
mother of best-selling author, Lisa See. In her mid-70's, Carolyn is
funny, irreverent and full of wisdom about how to live life fully, not
take things too seriously, and make whatever you're engaged in, no matter
how seemingly dreary, fun.
Drawing from her book, Making a Literary Life: Advice for Writers and
Other Dreamers, Carolyn shared 8 principles for living a
"writer's life". These principles can easily be adapted for all
dreamers who desire to create a happy and fulfilling life engaged in a
passionate pursuit (whether it be creativity, career, spirituality,
service, etc.). The 8 principles are:
1. Spend a significant, but not overwhelming, amount of time each day
doing what you love, five days a week for the rest of your life!
2. Write a "charming note" (that does not ask for a favor) 5
days a week for the rest of your life to people you love and/or admire.
This could also include sending flowers, balloons or food. And always
bring food whenever you visit people. Be a bringer of charming gifts.
Rather than focusing on what you don't have or may have lost in the
process of aging, practice "ferocious good deeds", showering
people with gifts.
3. Make an outside excursion at least once a week doing something you've
always wanted to do but haven't done yet. Preferably something that might
be fun and that would be new for you.
4. Only share your dream with people who will support and encourage you.
Don't hang out with the naysayers or people who are invested in you
feeling miserable! One tip for disarming those who would try to thwart,
blame or criticize you: simply respond to their attacks with, "No
kidding!" or "Hmm. Thank you!"
5. Start where you are. Consider: What's the genre of your life? Opera,
soap opera, action- adventure, cooking/food, erotica, screwball comedy?
Be honest with yourself. Whatever it is, that's a hint about what you
might want to do more of. Don't be ashamed of what you really want, what
you like. This is the time of life to be your Ideal Self. Look at what
you really want for your life and give yourself permission to go for it.
Even if it's a solitary pleasure, that's ok.
6. Try a little "white magic" - affirmations, visualizations,
treasure maps (or at the very least, avoid hexing yourself!). Try
affirmations such as: "I stay on purpose joyously", "I am
following my highest purpose, even when I don't know what it is,"
"Everything always turns out much more exceptionally than I
plan."
7. Make rejection a process. Find the blessing in a seemingly
disappointing outcome. Befriend your enemies. Don't lose your temper!
Make yourself the hero of your own stories.
8. Remember, it's all just a game. The ultimate outlook for all of us is
the same -death! It's important to acknowledge that. The objects of the
game of life are love, fun and truth. As we journey through the second
half of life, it's our time to figure out how we live the rest of our
lives as our Ideal Lives. We've paid our debt to society. Now, it's just
us and the Universe and time is of the essence.
Love and blessings,
Carol
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